Advice from the Emperor of Rome, Marcus Aurelius
“Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one”
The legal system is a different world. Coping skills you may have developed in life may not serve you well. This is especially true in a divorce, or in any case involving children. Focus on being a good person and a good parent. Keep your behavior and temper in line with that goal. Even in the most contentious of divorce cases, there is no other way to succeed.